ALWAYS

YOU have the power.  Every day you have the opportunity to use it.  Will today be one of those days that you choose to use your power to make a difference?

I realized only recently why we so often fail to employ this always available power.  We don't really believe in it.  We live in a culture that celebrates BIG everything: big expenditures, big achievement, big contribution.  We have gotten to the unfortunate place where we discount anything unworthy of a headline.

I have no wish to discount any goodness that deserves a headline.  The pertinent point is this: the small, often unheralded, daily acts of kindness, generosity, thoughtfulness, caring and love are making a larger difference in the world than the headlines.  

Even when you do not see an immediate result, be assured that these acts are changing the world.  Every loving, conciliatory, comforting, forgiving, kind or inspiring word or gesture makes a significant difference.  Each one changes you, the recipient, and the energy of the planet.

Every time you smile at a neighbor or stranger, hold a door for someone, allow another driver to go ahead of you, give up your place in line, say thank you, act with generosity, reach out to someone in need, withhold criticism, offer a compliment, practice random acts of kindness, lend a hand, forgive quickly, comfort another human being, or just listen with love, YOU make a difference.  YOU change the world in the direction of love.  And your act ripples outward creating waves of positive change that you will never even know about.

You have the power.  It ALWAYS makes a difference.  All you have to do is use it.

 

Goodness Wins in a Landslide

Today I am happy to bring you a piece on Gratitude written by another author: Ocean Robbins.  This is a fun article filled with lots of interesting research on the amazing benefits of practicing gratitude.  Please go here to read the article: http://www.dailygood.org/view.php?sid=380

There is one flaw in the article and it is the very first paragraph.  Here is what it says: "Our world is pretty messed up. With all the violence, pollution and crazy things people do, it would be easy to turn into a grouchy old man without being either elderly or male. There's certainly no shortage of justification for disappointment and cynicism."

This is a common misperception about our world.  YES there is a lot of ugliness and suffering in our world.  But the balance sheet of good versus evil is dramatically weighted on the side of goodness.  Each and every single day billions of acts of kindness, caring and generosity are selflessly performed by human beings.  The very reason our daily lives continue the way they do is that love is more prevalent on the planet than hate, understanding and compassion are more prevalent than violence. 

This is not a trivial point.  It matters that we all understand this.  When we walk around with the doom and gloom view that the world is a stinking mess, we are less motivated to act from the goodness in ourselves.  This negative belief becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.  When we get clear about the truth of the situation - that love, compassion, thoughtfulness, kindness and caring are happening all around us, every minute of the day, we begin to notice those acts and to contribute more of our own.

The lens we use to look at the world has a significant influence on the way we act.  Bad news will always be prominently broadcasted by both the news agencies and individuals.  It is the massive goodness in the world that needs to be noticed, celebrated, and remembered.  Look around you today and begin to see just how loving and kind human beings are day in and day out.  This is the truth in every part of the world.

The Most Important Decision

"The most important decision we ever make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or a hostile universe."  Albert Einstein

Each of us is operating under one of these two beliefs - whether or not we have ever consciously contemplated the question.  Here is just a short list of how life shows up when you are operating from the belief that the universe is beneficent:

You see the good in others even when they are troubled or acting unkindly.

You laugh at life's little irritations.

When something goes not as you had planned or hoped, you look for the blessing in what showed up instead.

You seldom take yourself seriously.

You experience each day as an opportunity.

You expect success even when it has not yet arrived.

You give easily, knowing that the universe always gives back.

You greet strangers as though they are your friend already.

If you were to poll a group of people who believe the universe is kind, and another group that holds that the universe is hostile, you would find that each group has lots of proof for their position.  What you search for, you will find.  And what you expect will arrive.  What you believe you will perceive, and  that is how your reality is born.

And the universe is so generous that it always leaves the choice up to you.  And it always responds when you choose differently.

"The reason things always work out for the best is because this is actually the highest of all spiritual laws.  Any apparent exceptions are simply evidence that work is still in progress, whether or not it can be seen."  Mike Dooley

You Will Never Know

Do you know the power of a smile freely offered, a compliment sincerely communicated, a kindness generously extended?  No.  We can never come close to estimating the influence of goodness set loose in the world, because every one of these small gifts perpetuates itself in radiating ripples of positive energy.

When you smile and offer a heartfelt "Good Morning" to a stranger, it changes them.  It increases the likelihood that they will be more welcoming to those they meet throughout the day.  When you commit small acts of kindness and generosity, the recipients are almost always compelled by the energy of your act to pass it on in some way to another.

Every single one of us has the power to change the world.  It does not require money, or large expenditures of time.  Small acts replicating themselves in widening circles of caring can change a home, a community and the world.  Every ripple you send off  manifests dividends you will never even know about.  Don't hold back!  

Loving YOU

The last blog (1/1/13) talked about the power of letting love loose in your life.  Today I want to remind you of one very important person to include in your love fest: YOU.

Self love is as important, if not more so, than loving all others.  When you practice self love, it makes it that much easier to love the rest of the world.  So here is a reminder list:

* Think kind thoughts about yourself.
* Notice all the good things that you do and appreciate yourself for them.
* Make time to be with just you, and be wholly present with yourself.
* Do something nice for yourself.
* Laugh at yourself with love and appreciation.
* Feed yourself well.
* Put your needs first every now and then.
* Give yourself rest and sleep.
* Forgive yourself when you make mistakes.
* Take good care of your body
* Choose good friends for yourself.
* Make time to dream about what you want out of life.
* Be authentic.
* Let yourself accept the kindness of others.
* Treat yourself
* Be truthful to yourself
* Make fun time for you - do what is fun for you
* Say thank you to yourself everyday
* Love yourself in all the wonderful ways you give love to others!

 The words of the tongue should have three gatekeepers: Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

- Arabian Proverb 

The words that we speak ripple forward into the world creating waves of impact.  How many of us are consciously aware of the nature of the waves our speech creates?  Do our words generate peace, understanding, communication, respect, approval, and kindness?  Or do they engender defensiveness, hostility, judgment, criticism, distance, and distrust?

Every time we speak we have the opportunity to promote either goodness or negativity.  And when we are in a calm and/or positive state of mind it is fairly easy to choose the high road.  But what about those moments of tension, stress, overwhelm, frustration, disappointment, and anger?  How conscious are we in those moments about the words we send out into the world?  For most of us the answer is: not very conscious.

The antidote to spewing negativity in 'the heat of the moment' is to s-l-o-w  it down.  The more emotionally charged a moment is, the less access we have to our normal reasoning faculties.  Malcolm Caldwell, in his international bestseller Blink says, "Arousal leaves us mind-blind."  The best choice in these moments is to slow everything down: slow our breathing (which will slow our racing heart), slow our thinking, slow our response time.

Why?  Because these moments are the opportunity to create the world we really want to live in: a world of peace, kindness and connection.  And in order to seize that opportunity we need to ask ourselves some important questions.  The first one is 'What do I truly want?'  Do I want to walk away from this situation being 'right'? Or do I want to create connection and understanding?

It is very enticing, in the moment, to want to be right.  But it is a short lived and shallow thrill.   Rightness is merely a matter of perspective anyway (another subject for another time).  Being right makes someone else wrong.  How good do you feel when someone makes you wrong?  There are other choices: understanding, acceptance, compromise, forgiveness.  These choices promote what we all want and need: connection and respect.

Every communication we send forth into the world has effects.  Each of us has a choice in every moment about what type of ripples we want to generate.  And in our 'heated' moments the stakes are raised.  These are the moments that we can truly manifest change in the world by choosing wisely.  These are the moments to move slowly and choose consciously to promote peace, understanding, respect and connection.