The Most Important Decision

"The most important decision we ever make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or a hostile universe."  Albert Einstein

Each of us is operating under one of these two beliefs - whether or not we have ever consciously contemplated the question.  Here is just a short list of how life shows up when you are operating from the belief that the universe is beneficent:

You see the good in others even when they are troubled or acting unkindly.

You laugh at life's little irritations.

When something goes not as you had planned or hoped, you look for the blessing in what showed up instead.

You seldom take yourself seriously.

You experience each day as an opportunity.

You expect success even when it has not yet arrived.

You give easily, knowing that the universe always gives back.

You greet strangers as though they are your friend already.

If you were to poll a group of people who believe the universe is kind, and another group that holds that the universe is hostile, you would find that each group has lots of proof for their position.  What you search for, you will find.  And what you expect will arrive.  What you believe you will perceive, and  that is how your reality is born.

And the universe is so generous that it always leaves the choice up to you.  And it always responds when you choose differently.

"The reason things always work out for the best is because this is actually the highest of all spiritual laws.  Any apparent exceptions are simply evidence that work is still in progress, whether or not it can be seen."  Mike Dooley

The Best Day of the Year

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday of the year because it is so simple.  All you have to do is share the day with people you love, eat good food, and be thankful.  It is a day for giving thanks, a day for gratitude.

Gratitude is the most essential tool in creating a joyful life.  And it is one of the few things of which you can never have too much.  There are three powerful tools for creating more gratitude in your life: willingness, focus and perspective.

Willingness is the key to all change.  Most people want at least something in their life to be different.  But wanting and willingness are two different things.  Willingness is the oomph that moves you from desire to action.  It requires that you do something different or differently than you have been doing.  It often requires that you tolerate discomfort (mental, spiritual, or physical).  It always requires allocation of time and energy.

Focus is where you shine the light.  Imagine all is darkness.  Focus is the place you aim your flashlight.  In every person's life there is an infinite number of possibilities on which to shine the light.  We are always choosing our focus.  The quality of our lives is often determined by the direction of our focus.

Perspective is about interpreting the subject of our focus.  Human beings are incessant interpreters.  We assign meaning to everything.  We tend to believe that the things (people, places, events, circumstances, etc) have their own inherent meanings, but this is an illusion.  WE assign meaning.  And at any time, we are free to change that meaning.  THAT is perspective.

Let me illustrate with a short story from my childhood.  I was ten, my brothers were 9 and 12, and my stepsister was 4.  We were playing a football game along with my Stepmother.  Boys against the girls.  We girls had the ball and we drew up a play to give 4 year old Cathy the football and Renee (my stepmother) and I would block the boys to give Cathy a straight shot to the end zone.  It worked perfectly except that Cathy got turned around somehow and ran to the wrong endzone, resulting in a touchdown for the boys.  I lost it.  I was screaming, "Not fair, not fair, do over, do over." I was over the edge upset.  Meanwhile everyone else was rolling on the ground laughing.  My focus was on the scoreboard in my head that had just rung up 6 points for the boys; and my perspective was that this was a calamity!  The rest of my family was focused on the fun of the game and their perspective was that it had just gotten hysterically funny.  They were all having a much better time than I was.  The facts were the same for all.  The focus and perspectives determined the level of enjoyment.

In these days leading up to Thanksgiving Day, I invite you to investigate what YOU focus on in your life.  In any given day you can focus on what drives you nuts or you can focus on the things for which you are grateful.  Your experience of your day will be determined by your focus and perspective.  Are you willing to shift your focus in order to experience more joy in your life???  And here's something else to consider: whatever you focus on you create more of (yes I know that is a dangling preposition - feel free to laugh about it!)  Happy Thanksgiving to you all.

Where Ever You Go, There You Are

YOU are the common ingredient in EVERY experience you have.  That means that you are also the primary ingredient in the over all experience of life you are having.

No matter where you go -  to work, to the mall, to the beach, to school, to the gym, on vacation, to a seminar, etc.,  AND even if you are staying home -  your experiences in these places reflect not very much about the places themselves and a whole lot about you.  Your experiences in these places reflect very little about the other people you encounter in them, and virtually everything about you.

Everything that you experience is created primarily by who you are being.  And this is true on multiple levels.  First, you perceive according to how you think and believe.  We like to think that what we perceive is what is there.  Not happening.  Ever wonder why two people can have such diverse reactions to the same event?  They are not having the same experience!  The 'out there' event is just the raw material that gets filtered on its way in by everything you currently believe, and then transformed into your version of reality by that same belief system and your current operating systems (desires, world views, fears, judgments, limitations).  Each of us is creating our reality moment to moment.

The next level of creating our experience is that who we are being moment to moment draws to us like oriented people, places and things. In other words, you get more of who you already are.

So, if you are NOT particularly pleased with how you are experiencing life - don't look out there to make changes, because it ain't happening out there!  If you want anything in your life to be different, change the common ingredient  - YOU.